Long ago, during my primary school days, I remember reading a lesson called ‘The Three Wise Men of Gotham’ in my English Reader. Those men were simply hilarious for their stupidity and this one story highlights that aspect.
They go to the nearby town to buy grocery and as per their list a dozen tins of cheese are included. Since they had accumulated a fairly heavy buy by the end of it all, they hit upon a brilliant idea of reducing their load and not without reasons, which was to make their return journey pleasurable. They decide to roll down the cheese tins towards the direction of their home in the village fully confident that the tins would fetch up much earlier than their own arrival! The story has it that those ‘wise’ men are still waiting for the cheese tins to arrive at their destination.
This evening, a similar situation was faced by yours truly. Since Lekha was laid up, I’d to do the marketing bit. After my usual evening walk and warming down exercises, I set off for the big evolution and had her prepare the ‘wish’ list. A religious procession, that seemed to be never ending, was an impediment to my scheme of things but I did not let it hamper my enthusiasm. My first destination happened to be the meat shop from where a favourite fish was bought(Lekha was subsequently unsatisfied with the standard of cleaning done by the vendor because she has her way always - best example of gender discrimination on the part of the vendor because that boy ensured that I was satisfied with his work). And I did not want to lose any time fighting a ‘lost’ case with him, in the prevailing circumstances.
The next stop was at the grocer’s. The old lady at the counter hit the roof laughing when I’d asked her for a kilogram of coffee powder. I’m still to understand this double standard – one can buy a kg of tea but not a kg of coffee and mind you, I'm yet to get a convincing explanation on this one! Anyways, after getting my requirements from the shop owner(wonder why she’d that patronizing look on her face?), my next stop was at the shop which sold fresh provisions. And soon, I’d become an interesting specimen to the passersby and the vendor, Akhil studying in class XII had become overtly, condescending, as I read through my wife’s list with my reading glasses on my nosebridge(must have been a comical sight, perhaps) – alas, why can’t people let you be the way you are? The fruit vendor, after that, became very protective of me in that he directed his son to help me with my ‘luggage’. And the young lad gave me a very ‘understanding’(?) wave as I pulled off from the kerb, once my van was loaded.
Do I give an impression to the others like a ‘lost babe in the woods’? I sincerely hope not!!
Tailpiece.
Today, the Indian Air Force has bestowed the rank of Group Captain to Sachin Tendulkar. Coming as it is on the heels of Kapil Dev and Mohanlal(the mallu fimdom’s superstar), who’d earlier been made Lieutenant Colonels, one wonders as to whether we really needed to do this at all. Are those ranks so cheap to achieve and why are we making icons when there are none? I call such exercises as gimmickry and attention grabbing ventures devoid of any meaningful outcome. Sachin, Kapil Dev and Mohanlal have achieved greatness in their respective fields, we all love them for that and I’d like them to get many more laurels on their onward endeavours! But for heaven’s sake let us not degrade the ranks of the services through such inocuous activities!!
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