Sentiments or misplaced loyalties?

We'd to attend a function that was unavoidable despite the fact that we're in a state of mourning. Moreover, I did not have the heart to say no to these friends of ours as it was a very special occasion for them.

The function was very well organised and we'd the opportunity to meet and interact with quite a few people that we'd always been planning to do but couldn't, due to paucity of time and other distractions. So we took advantage of the opportunity that had fallen into our laps on its own and considered it as godsend! Then, as if on cue, my cellphone got insistent and as I got to take the call, the people around me had noticed that the pouch that I carry the gadget in, was in tatters and pulled my leg.

No amount of my telling them that the pouch was presented to me by a very special friend and hence, had a sentimental value that was priceless, did they deter from making fun of me. Their bone of contention was that I was stupidly emotional and sentimental over trivia, one of them even offered to buy me a new pouch at that instant which I'd to politely, yet firmly turn down - damn sweet of her, though!

The same questions were expressed when I'd insisted on spending more time at Leela kunjamma's and Santhan kochachan's homes, over the last few days. On a personal note, by doing so, I was trying to shake off the guilt of not having given more of my time for them when they're up and about!

Being stupidly sentimental as the people for whom I'm displaying emotions are not even going to be aware of it? But what about the tremendous sense of satisfaction that I derive from deep within?

Yes, I'm a confused bundle of thoughts but I ain't worried as I feel comfortable and am sure that I'm right!

Past events, yet again!

1. Moral policing.

We, mallus, have done it yet again. Shaheed - also known as Bava - all of 26 yrs, was manhandled by a few of the locals who'd objected to 'an immoral relationship' he had in the area called Mukkam, near Kozhikode. He was tied to an electric post and given the third degree treatment. Shaheed, later succumbed to his injuries at the hospital where he was in intensive care. The police also speculates that it could've been out of spite on the part of a few locals with whom Shaheed had an altercation on account of a minor accident in which his bike was involved, a few days before.

Who gave these people the right to take another's life? I hope that the culprits are brought to book without delay. It's such incidents that make me wish that we should also have the law of the 'Sharia'at' in our country!


2. Former President frisked.

It has once again come to light that Mr. Abdul Kalam, our former President, was frisked at the JFK airport, in New York, last month and the yanks have reportedly apologised for the faux pas. Why do these things get repeated, time and again? I'm sure the former President's credentials would have been clearly stated in his travel documents and if so, why did the error ever take place? Probably, the yanks are unrelenting in aspects of security which is also right, when one were to view the whole incident dispassionately and that explains the reason, that, being the gentleman that he is, Mr. Kalam went through the whole rigmarole without making a fuss!

Why don't we too take a leaf out of the Americans' outlook on security and do it strictly, correctly without fear or favour!

The ultimate.

Dateline 12 Nov.

0832h . A portion of Leela kunjamma's ashes were immersed in the serene backwaters of the Paravoor 'kaayal' by her eldest son, Gopee Krishna.

1042h . The remaining portion of her ashes were immersed in the waters of the Arabian Sea, at Paapanaasam in Varkala about 15 kms from where she'd lived.

Leela kunjamma's earthly form has thus become memory and one can only take solace of continuing to see her smiling face from the numerous snaps on the family album and fondly remember those nice moments that she'd given us! 

RIP Leela kunjamma, you shall always be in our thoughts!! 

Our needs are fleeting.

Shekinah, the 16 yr old daughter of the Mathews has left for her heavenly abode.

She was supposed to have taken her class X examinations in 2010.

She was diagnosed with bone cancer and had undergone many rounds of chemotherapy at the CMC, Vellore. She was a valiant young lady who fought the fearsome illness with fortitude and a smile on her face.

Santhosh Mathew, her father and my schoolmate, struggling to hold back his tears said at the eulogy in church and I quote, "In early 2000, the matter that worried me most was Shekinah's X standard examinations. In 2011, the same time, we're praying for her life and exams were out of mind, inconsequential". Unquote.

Shows how transient needs are in life - a few of them attained and many not!

A tearful prayer for the young lady and prayers for giving the grieving parents adequate strength to tide over their difficult times.


PS.

My apologies for spreading melancholia in my last few posts but the losses that are taking place, in close vicinity, have taken its toll. Hope my readers understand! 

Biju, Francis and Sukumaran.

At Thiruvananthapuram. Traffic was horrific and consequently took support of the autorickshaws - the interaction with three of those drivers were eye openers! And a fantastic education at that.

1. 0650h. From Palkulangara to Pattom.
I was to be at Vilasini kunjamma's house for the 3rd day ceremonies after Santhan kochachan's demise. Biju's auto was timely and godsend. It was a brand new, gleaming vehicle and I happened to be his first customer - an honour! His speech was slurred due to a growth in his vocal chords and the doctors have given a fifty percent chance of a successful surgery. His acceptance of the situation was something that touched me and I quote, "I'd feel quite sad if I were to lose my voice, post surgery and I'm 38 yrs old so, it doesn't matter anymore. Moreover, my wife doesn't mind, so why should I bother?" He has a son(in class 7), a daughter(in class 5) and has no complaints about life. He's promised to be in touch with me.

2. 0710h. From Pattom to 'Santhi kavadom' and back.
Me and an uncle were hurtling towards the cremation grounds to collect Santhan kochachan's ashes. The solitary car that was earmarked for the purpose was oversubscribed because a couple of officials of the Nair Service Society - the co-ordinators of the ceremony - had to be accommodated. Francis, whose auto it was, was incensed that the NSS guys were prone to taking short cuts in the conduct of the ceremony. Answering our surprised looks, he said coyly that his wife was a Nair and hence, was aware of the entire sequence. He was only feeling bad that the guys were taking advantage of our grief (and ignorance too!). Damn nice of him. People with whom you've no connection, do bat for you - yet another example to show that every human being is good deep within!!

3. 1115h. From Pattom to Palkulangara,
Sukumaran happened to be our 'saarthi' and right at the start, he gave us a rundown about the massive choke in the arterial road thanks to a roadblock orchestrated by the CPM and the consequent route that he was gonna take. A strong Congress party backer, his life is a 'riches to rags' story wherein his family had sunk a lot of money on him to fight the assembly elections in the late 70s, which he lost and attributes it to the shenanigans of his coworkers and mind you, he was a communist then! He'd some real pungent and colourful adjectives for some of its current crop of leaders. His wife, however, is a loyal communist even to this day. Presently, he finds solace that his children - Shiny and Shaiju - are stars by themselves by their excellence in the world of sports. The daughter is an IT graduate while his son is an aspiring IPS trainee!

A great day and a fantastic fund of experiences from simple, yet resolute people. Thanks, Biju, Francis and Sukumaran for the superb education delivered to me on a platter. I shall remain indebted to you!       

I'm at loggerheads with my God.

Yes, I'm 'kattie' with my God. He's taken away two people that I was quite fond of within a span of a week. Leela kunjamma and Santhan kochachan were wonderful people and did no harm to anyone. And I can vouch for the fact that their personal needs were so little and they always believed in giving and spreading happiness around them. They could have lived for many more years as their medical discomfort were not acute or insurmountable!

As an elder tried to console me, I'm trying to accept the explanation that their time for being with us had come to an end and they are on to better things, according to the philosophy of life which is also the cosmic truth. According to customs and traditions practiced by us, going to places of worship, lighting the lamp in one's 'puja room' at home and saying one's prayers are taboo during the period of mourning.

I have suddenly become skeptical about the efficacy of saying prayers everyday, especially when God hasn't heeded to my pleas of not taking my near and dear ones away. I'm seriously wondering as to whether I should resume my daily prayers after the period of mourning is over!

Krishna's explanation to Arjuna in the Bhagwad Gita that every human being comes into this world on a pre-ordained script written by him, notwitstanding!!   

An unplanned gift.

Yesterday also happened to be my dad's 87th birthday. But we'd decided to keep the celebrations muted to wishing him 'many happy returns' thanks to the unexpected passing away of Santhan kochachan.

Lekha and me had reached Thiruvananthapuram directly while my parents, along with my younger sister and her daughter, had gone for an urgent social calling to be with a good friend of their's going through trying times before fetching up at Vilasini kunjamma's house. Both mom and dad were very sad seeing Santhan kochachan's   lifeless form lying in state. Their lament was as to why god had spared the elder ones like them and chosen the younger ones. I could understand their angst as both, Leela kunjamma and Santhan kochachan, used to consult them on every important thing that happened in their lives because, for them, their 'chettan and chechi's' endorsement was sacrosanct.

I could only watch my parents' anguish like a helpless spectator!

Just before my parents' departure, my dad had called me aside and asked me as to whether I could fetch him a new walking stick as the existing one was giving him problems. The needful was done as two of my nephews volunteered to go to the 'medical equipment shop' a few kms away and get the quadruped stick.

As he wielded his new walking stick, my dad tells me quietly, 'son, this is a very special birthday gift for me'. I could feel the lump in my throat because I'd definitely not planned this!