Adieu Varadamma appachi!

Varadamma appachi, all of 85 yrs, passed into the mist of time this morning at a half past 6, owing to a cardiac arrest. She was admitted into the ICU of the Nair's Hospital, at Kollam, last Friday when she suffered a mild heart attack consequent to her blood pressure and sugar levels going below normal. Jayan, her third son with whom she was staying all this while, was in attendance. Her two elder sons, Omanakkuttan and Aniyan reached her bedside yesterday. Her youngest son, Sandip and his family have settled down in Japan and are Japanese citizens. Hence, they were absent.....her funeral was at a half past 3, this afternoon, at the crematorium near her house. Her husband, Janardanan Pillai, had passed away almost a decade ago. He was an ayurveda physician by profession.

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My paternal grandparents, N Krishna Panicker and K Kalyani Amma, had sired eight children - four sons and four daughters. Varadamma appachi was the youngest of the daughters and the only person that is left of the siblings, now, is Ramadasan kochachhan, settled in Nasik.

Shall jot down a few of my observations about my appachi on this sad occasion.

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I'd first heard about her in a conversation between my dad and his father. He used to send a sum of money to his dad, every month, for the construction of his house (Raj Nivas) and dad and I had gone during his leave and this conversation had ensued, "Son, the bulk of the money that you'd sent me last month has been used for Varadamma's education" - she was doing her BEd and was staying with the PN Panicker joint family at Thiruvananthapuram. And I can never forget my dad's cryptic reply, "Dad, I don't ever want to know about the breakdown of expenses". And soon after, I'd seen my appachi in a full flowing skirt and blouse! Incidentally, as was the prevalent custom those days, she never came in front of her elder brother, instead, always stood at the door, covering herself partially with the curtain while in conversation. And I must tell you that she followed this habit till my father's passing away; when I'd made fun of her about this, she told me that she did it out of deep respect and love towards her elder brother. And my dad was very fond of his kid sister!   

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She got posted into the aided school at Kottavattom - a bit far from the house - soon after she had passed the BEd course.

My mom and she got along like a house on fire. To let you into a secret, she was the mediator between my appachi and her love - my future chittappan, who was posted in the village Ayurveda Dispensary then - passing letters between them, while she was the Branch Post Mistress of the local post office.

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And as my parents and appachi-chittappan went about their lives, we got to meet each other during leave and vacations with the progress of each other being noted constantly.

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I'd seen her at my parents' funerals but can never forget the sadness writ large on her face, seeing my mom's lifeless body, lying in state. She'd not expected her to pass away that early and she had told me that in one unguarded moment!

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She used to insist on my calling her up, as often as I could and would talk on and on - the longest was when we talked for about an hour and a half: mind you, it was not callous talk but one that had an abundance of anecdotes, humour and knowledge. The last I'd spoken to her was during the month of Jun and whenever we used to be at Raj Nivas, a visit, at least once to her place, was a must. She used to go out of her way to feed me with what I was fond of and was full of conversation, frequently punctuated with her peals of girlish laughter!

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I have this feeling that my grandparents, dad, mom, my aunts and appachi must be laughing their guts out, in flowing conversation right now, wherever they are!

RIP Varadamma appachi! My salute to a great person with my tears and prayers. Will miss you till my very end.

Tailpiece.

Got up at 6, the chores and was ready by a half past 9. Melancholia had set in, hearing about appachi's passing away. Incidentally, today also happens to be Suresh's Remembrance Day as per the English calendar!

Lekha and I'd watered the plants this evening and sure enough, now the time is 2320 hrs and it's raining cats and dogs!