Thursday, December 8, 2011

I can't erase them!

On my cellphone I still retain the telephone numbers of people who've passed into the mist of time. The list is increasing and I'm not happy about its expanding girth!

The last two numbers, on the list, that would never elicit the replies from the people whom I'd love to hear any day, any time, belong to the recently deceased Leela kunjamma and Santhan kochachan. Then why do I stubbornly insist on retaining their numbers?

Being the confused bundle of thoughts that I'm, frankly, I've no plausible explanation. A few relatives and close friends have asked me about it and have advised that I should stop being stupidly sentimental since it was high time that I removed them as it served no meaningful purpose! I must admit that once I almost came to doing just that when something tugged at my being, deep within and I'd to abandon the exercise!!

I've asked my inner self, time and again, for a sane answer. Let me endeavour to put it down in words.

I feel that I owe it to them because in some way I feel that I've them and the wonderful memories that they've given me around and within me, always and every time! Without hesitation I can say that all of them have contributed to the making of my personality and my growth, thus far. So how can I be thankless and forget them just because I'll never meet them in their earthly form that I am familiar with, by erasing their numbers? Secondly, in the business of living my life, by seeing their names while scrawling the 'list of contacts' brings back pleasant memories and takes away the 'guilt' of having forgotten them - albeit for a short while - during the hustle and the bustle!   

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