Wednesday, March 25, 2020

Absolutely brilliant!

An Obituary printed in the London Times.....

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as :-

    * Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
    * Why the early bird gets the worm;
    * Life isn't always fair;
    * And maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well - intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realise that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap; and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death,
     
    * by his parents, Truth and Trust,
    * by his wife, Discretion,
    * by his daughter, Responsibility, and
    * by his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 5 stepbrothers :-

    * I know my rights
    * I want it now
    * Someone else is to blame
    * I'm a victim
    * Pay me for doing nothing

Not many attended his funeral because so few realised he was gone. 

On such a note, here are just two reactions from those 'knowledgeable ones' regarding the lock down
announced by the Prime Minister, last evening :-

     * The PM has not taken into account the food that my dog needs.
     * In India, this lock down can never work.

We need to take these cynics also along with us to prove that we can.


Tailpiece.

Had got up about half an hour late, the chores and was ready well within time. By 1100 hrs, Suma had come by after getting clearance to come to work at our place, from the police beat near her house. Am impressed by her keenness to do work. Meanwhile, Jaya had visited the hospital to get her medicines and should be able to come by for work, next week.


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